Your doctor says you will need donor eggs to conceive.
We get it — it’s hardly the answer you wanted to hear during your already arduous fertility journey. Once you’ve taken the time to absorb the news, you’ll probably have tons of questions about what comes next.
That’s where Everie comes in. More than just an egg bank, Everie boasts a team of fertility and donation experts who can answer all the questions about egg donation likely swimming around your head.
To start, there is a spectrum of options for egg donation, from known egg donation to anonymous egg donation.
What is known egg donation?
“Known egg donation is where the donor and the intended parent can share contact information, meet, and potentially establish a relationship,” says Brian LoManto, Everie’s Scientific Advisor. He goes on to explain that in the past, the donor and intended parent weren’t able to “meet and form a more personal connection.” Donations were either anonymous or carefully arranged so the donor-conceived child could obtain the donor’s contact information once they turned 18.
But Everie is working to change the parameters of known egg donation. “Traditionally, known donation was exclusive to the donor being a friend, family member, or occasionally someone the intended parents found by alternate means,” says LoManto. Now Everie is “expanding the possibilities, bringing the transparency and relational potential of known donation into what once was an anonymous process.” For those intended parents who may not want a fully known egg donor, however, Everie also offers semi-known where donors and parents meet, but contact information is not immediately shared, and ID is released to only the donor-conceived child at age 18 if requested.
How does the known egg donation process work?
Participating in known egg donation begins with both the donor and intended parents “deciding that their journeys include establishing a personal connection to each other,” says LoManto.
Everie then facilitates the exchange of personal information, including arranging a meeting between the donor and the intended parents. “This relationship is governed by meticulously developed and highly scrutinized legal contracts to ensure protection and clarity for all parties involved,” assures LoManto.
The benefits of known egg donation
While every donor and intended parent is different, with some opting for anonymous egg donation, there are several benefits to creating a personal connection between donors and intended parents.
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Trust and comfort: “Knowing the donor can increase trust and comfort for the intended parents, providing reassurance and peace of mind about the donor’s motivations and background and the source of the eggs,” says LoManto.
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Access to detailed medical history: By selecting known egg donation, the intended parents have direct access to the donor’s comprehensive medical and genetic history, not only at the time of donation but throughout the donor-conceived child’s lifetime. “This can have untold benefits for the child’s health and that of subsequent generations,” says LoManto.
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Transparency and honesty: Opting for an anonymous egg donation leaves both the donors and intended parents with far less information in an already uncertain process. Known egg donation allows for more open communication, as well as a clearer understanding of what’s ahead.
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Legal clarity: Known egg donation necessitates clear guidelines and protections for both the donor and intended parents. Therefore, the process includes “comprehensive legal agreements specifically tailored to individual known donations,” assures LoManto.
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Future contact: Known egg donations also provide the possibility of contact between the donor and intended parents before the child turns 18. This includes “flexibility in the level of contact that suits the preference of both the donor and intended parent while providing maximum benefit to the donor-conceived person,” says LoManto.
Additional reasons to consider known egg donation
If you’re still mulling over going the anonymous egg donation route, it’s important to have as many facts at your fingertips so you can make an informed decision. Opting for anonymous egg donation could result in unforeseen issues down the road, so it’s worth considering the following:
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Anonymity is no longer possible: Thanks to the advancement of genetic lineage testing and social media, “maintaining anonymity today is almost an impossible task,” says LoManto. “As genetic testing services become the norm, the possibility of guaranteeing anonymity could potentially vanish.”
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Limited medical and genetic history information: Anonymous donors and intended parents only receive the medical and genetic information that’s available at the time of donation. Therefore, “questions can arise regarding medical and health information that could significantly impact the life of the donor-conceived person,” warns LoManto. “This could increase health risks throughout the life of the child.”
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Identity issues: This limited medical and genetic history information could also eventually cause identity issues for the child. “The donor-conceived child may be curious and have questions about their genetic origins and feel a sense of loss about their biological origins,” says LoManto.
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Ethical and legal issues: On that note, ethical and legal concerns surrounding the donor-conceived child’s right to know their genetic background may arise from the choice to operate off of limited information.
Is known egg donation right for you?
Egg donation is complicated enough without getting to know the other involved party, so it’s understandable if some people are still leaning toward the anonymous option. After all, anonymous egg donation includes clear boundaries between the donor and intended parents and promises interim privacy and confidentiality. Known egg donation may result in complex emotional dynamics between the donor, donor-conceived child, and intended parents.
To their credit, LoManto and the team at Everie are cognizant that these “relationship dynamics can be complex.” However, they feel the benefits of known egg donation far outweigh these potential adjustments. Everie has also implemented several systems to guide both donors and recipients successfully through the known egg donation process.
Above all, the Everie team highly encourages all participants to undergo counseling. “Both psychological and legal counseling are encouraged to fully understand all the emotional, ethical, and legal implications of the known donation process,” says LoManto.
“This type of donation and the relationship it forms can deeply enrich the lives of all parties involved,” continues LoManto. “Going into it with honesty, flexibility, and an understanding of the future considerations can create a strong, lifelong connection that benefits everyone.”
Sarene Leeds holds an M.S. in Professional Writing from NYU, and is a seasoned journalist, having written and reported on subjects ranging from TV and pop culture to health, wellness, and parenting over the course of her career. Her work has appeared in Rolling Stone, The Wall Street Journal, Vulture, SheKnows, and numerous other outlets. A staunch mental health advocate, Sarene also hosts the podcast “Emotional Abuse Is Real.” Visit her website here, or follow her on Instagram or Twitter.